If you get anxious in bed, can’t relax, or are having a dry spell, LUBE is the way forwards.
It may sound obvious, but as a young *cough, yes, 30 is still young*, woman, I sometimes felt like I shouldn’t need lube.
My judgmental brain told me that I should have no worries getting my vagina like a slip and slide- I shouldn’t need to put any thought into it. I thought lube is only for older women or those who struggle to get wet.
But, NEWS FLASH- lube is for everyone because sometimes we ALL STRUGGLE TO GET WET.
Whether we’re worried, tired, dehydrated (YES thats a thing!) or just more of a slow burner in bed, it’s really common for all women to take a while to turn on the waterworks.
Anxiety in particular short circuits my ability to get wet because I worry (about sex, getting turned on- basically everything!).
Here’s my top three ways I use lube to help with my anxiety…
#1: it tricks your mind into feeling desire because your body thinks it’s horny! It’s often a bit cold when it’s first applied to your fanny, and my body thinks I’m naturally a bit more turned on so my mind then follows and I can just enjoy the moment.
#2: it takes the pressure off of being wet naturally so I instantly relax knowing I can have sex anyway, and it’s not catch 22 worrying about it or wondering whether my partner will notice.
#3: You can then start having sex/playing around- even if you don’t feel like the horniest person on earth, you can often start a bit of cheeky pene or use a finger to begin ramping up your sex drive to where you want it to be.
Therefore- lube is king.
P.S. I love this article by the amazing Tracey Cox about how lube can transform your sex life.