Layla Martin, an acclaimed sexuality coach and tantra expert, calls the pussy massage a way to experience “exquisite pleasure and healing”.

Before you go to running to the hills at the sound of tantra and pussies and voodoo, give this particular exercise a chance because it can do wonders for desire. 

Have a read below about the truth on pussy massages- what are they, and how can they help you get back your sex drive?

What is a pussy massage?

A pussy massage isn’t really about sex.

It’s not done by a professional, or a stranger.

It also isn’t an internal thing, as many people associate the vagina with. 

In fact, it’s not even just a massage of your pussy!

A pussy massage is simply a massage, given by a lover, that works to relax the whole pelvic region.

Using oils or lubricant and in a safe, tranquil environment, your partner will gently stroke, squeeze and warm the belly, thighs, bum and vulva to deeply relax the woman. If you choose to, you can involve giving pleasure, and even orgasm, into the massage- however, that’s not it’s main aim.

There are tons of misconceptions about pussy (or yoni) massages. but in reality they’re an incredibly simple and effect way to connect with a partner, mix things up in the bedroom whilst bringing the enjoyment back to sex.

Why a pussy massage can help revive your sex drive?

A pussy massage has SO many benefits and also helps with a number of areas that might be problematic for women who’ve lost their libido. 

  1. Firstly, it is incredibly relaxing to give and feels lovely to receive!
  2. Giving and receiving a massage helps create more intimacy through acts of kindness, which for many of us can get less frequent in relationships the more there is conflict and resentment.
  3. It also has the effect of helping both of you associate sex with something nice and that you do together, rather than sex as a source of tension.
  4. Pussy massages take the focus off sex and back onto non-goal oriented touch. Practising just touching each other, and finding the joy and deep sense of peace from simple touch, is a cornerstone of the work many sex therapists do with their clients, particularly with sensate touch therapy.
  5. This relieves much of the pressure around sex, as we often believe certain narratives about how we should have sex which can cause it to become quite samey (and a little monotonous) for many women. Mixing things up a bit in the bedroom with a pussy massage can help with this Coolidge effect.

How to give a pussy massage?

Layla Martin is a fantastic advocate of the pussy massage and you can find a great video tutorial on 12 steps to giving a pussy massage here.

Remember to do the work in setting the scene for your massage. Candles, incense and the right music can all increase the relaxation effect. I promise you won’t regret giving it a go!